Rare is the symbiosis of early-morning yawn and laughter. I struggle enough to open my eyes in the first two hours of the day, like an hour-old puppy fighting to deprive itself of the warmth of the womb in favour of a life of terror and torment outside.
But today I had a belly laugh in the sunrise haze to such a crescendo that I spent moments of great gladness on the floor, prostrate and contorted.
The madness on show mimicked the lunacy of the world lurking on the other side of the Atlantic. The unprompted mirth was a method of internalising some news I’d found in my morning Google Alerts concerning this.
Sweet baby Jesus on a candy cane cross…
If you’re not already rolling around in a perceived state of insanity, then allow me to elaborate.
The concept of social media isn’t truly understood, yet. It’s as fresh as a daisy. According to an industry analyst, a respected commentator friend of mine, social media is as TV was in the 50s, as the wireless (kids, that’s radio) in the 20s. It’s barely been born. It’s like that goddamn puppy.
So how, pray tell, can someone possibly be offering an MBA in Social Media Marketing? I’ve been to some ‘make it up as we go along’ business presentations, but an entire course?
I was thinking of starting a series of seminars entitled ‘Why You Should Buy An iPad 3.0′. Hell, I sure can predict what it’ll look like; I can virtually smell it if I sniff the back of my HTC G1 phone. So why not?
As much as the next man I’m a great fan of entrepreneurship. Gotta grab it with both hands, gotta do it now. Gotta learn on the fly, make mistakes as you go.
But this is a university course! Universities, bastions of academia. Where kids go to learn stuff they can apply in real life. Not pipe dreams, confusing metaphors, mixed messages.
I can imagine the course material being passed around. “Now guys, you have to understand that Twitter and Facebook are the most amazing ways you can connect to your au…. oh, no, wait, Google Buzz! We just heard Google Buzz has been launched. That changes everything! Class, sit up, I have some news. Google Buzz is the most amazing way you…”
Things are changing too fast right now. You can’t teach on how to use social media, because tomorrow will redefine the game. And you’ll already have paid £1,000s for yesterday’s chip paper.
It smacks of the eBook game. Buy me, then I’ll slap you with a bill for the next one. It’ll be just like this one, but the cover will be red instead of blue. And I’ll change some of the words – only some, a scattering, perhaps – to make it feel like you’ve bought a totally new product.
Upgrade, upgrade, upgrade. Because once you’re caught in the spin, you’ll never get out. Neat marketing. Back to the days of control by the few, with the masses obediently following behind.